Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Project Runway Ep7: The Fashion that Drives You, Part I

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This week, the designers are greeted by Heidi on the runway wearing some sort of heinous ruffled referee-looking thing. Because the models weren't used - again - last week, Joe has his pick between Daniel's and Kelli's models, or can keep his own. He keeps his model. Heidi gives the designers a rooftop address to find out about their challenge, and tells them to hit the road.

Blayne de Soleil is certain that this challenge will be "exclusive... rooftop-style." Uh, okay? Korto wonders if they're going to someone's penthouse... Mariah Carey perhaps? Oh god I hope not. As it happens, their destination is the roof of a parking garage. They giggle like scared little kids in the elevator, until the doors open to reveal a line of Saturns (of course), and Tim.

Tim introduces Chris Webb, who is the Lead Color Designer for Saturn. He says that 85% of the materials used to make these Saturn Hybrids are recyclable, so the designers will be recycling Saturn materials to make an innovative dress. Each car is stuffed with materials used to make the cars, and each designer gets a crappy-looking cart - you know those "old lady" carts with two wheels you bring to the grocery store? - and about four seconds to madly scavenge materials from their chosen car. There are loads of seatbelts and bits of interior trim being chucked around. Terri has trouble moving her cart once it's full and piled with stuff. Suede, in interview, says he grabbed some floor mats for a top and that's "wackadoodle." That word is officially dead to me, Suede.

Back in the workroom, Tim scolds the designers for disappointing the judges in the last Innovation challenge - the grocery store challenge - and says he wants real innovation. The designers immediately start wrestling with the unfamiliar, unwieldy materials. Kenley smashes a headlight assembly on the floor to break the lamp out, and claps and giggles with delight when it breaks. Do I sense a hidden destructive streak in our Vintage Girl? Joe holds up a carburetor and asks if anyone wants to trade it for a headlight.

Jerrell feels very confident and is talking about a "futuristic bustier." Leanne is making some sort of crazy structured corset-bodice thingy. Stella decides that she doesn't want to do the expected "leathuh," that she wants to step outside the box and do something totally different, using seatbelts to make a tiered skirt. There's lots of hammering and ripping and grumbling around the workroom. Suede lets us know that "Suede has cuts, Suede has blisters... It's blood for fashion and I'm bleedin' it!" Oh god, someone just kill me. Then he launches into some story about his father giving him his uncle's Buick or some shit. Stella has a pointy leather hat with long sides and puts it on Blayne, who then does a Darth Vader impression. I have to admit, when Blayne's not being a douche he can be pretty adorable.

The models are sent in - and NOOOO, Shannone, Kenley's model, has dropped out of the competition, for reasons unstated. Shannone was the best model this season! Kenley, of course, takes it really hard, but she's kind of a bitch and kind of unprofessional to Germaine, the model brought back to replace Shannone. Yes, it's hours of extra work to re-fit a garment for a new model, but she makes Germaine feel like it's her fault that she's got this issue now. Girl, Germaine is doing your ass a favor by walking in your garment, ok? So suck it up. Referring to your new model as "flat and boxy" is not nice.

Korto has woven a coat out of seatbelts that has potential, but at the moment makes her model look like a Sumo wrestler wearing a picnic basket. Kenley snarks about everyone using seatbelts. God, just shut up. Blayne is having issues with the sewing machines and the seatbelts, and for the first time he genuinely seems frustrated. He's designed a "flowy" dress, but Blayne? Seatbelts ain't "flowy," they're flappy. Dun-dun-dunnn foreshadowing! Speaking of frustrated, Keith is having some PMS, being stompy and grouchy and making the other designers a little uneasy.

Tim does his walk-through, and starts with Jerrell, who is making a really cool-looking top and miniskirt. Tim is quite impressed. He moves on to Korto and compliments her "60's mod thing" and warns her not to lose "the sophistication." He then moves on to Stella, and expresses disappointment in her design, saying that it doesn't take the concept of innovation far enough. Leanne's bump-hip corset-y thing gets a "Wow." Keith interviews a bunch of blahblahblah. Tim tells the designers he's very excited with what they've come up with, and gives them until midnight before swanning off to wherever he swans off to.

We see Terri, who's having a bit of a breakdown, literally fall down onto the floor laughing, because Korto's still-stiff seatbelt coat somehow reminds her of "Jeepers Peepers." Jerrell interviews that Terri "has two faces and four patterns... Don't trust the bitch!" Ooooh!

Next morning, Atlas apartments, Korto is picking out her impressively huge and fluffy Afro while wearing a gorgeous black-and-white African beaded collar. We see Stella talking to her boyfriend, William, aka "Ratbones," on her Blackberry (the device seems to confuse her as much as the digital cameras did). She tells us that she will be collaborating with him on a line called Zotis & Bones. Awesome!

Next: Model Drama, and the Runway Show!

Update on Shannone's exit: Nick Vierros reveals in his blog that the models don't get paid, so they will take off if they get a better-paying opportunity, as there is little incentive for them to stay given how little they are actually promoted by the show. (Actually, what he said was "it does not behoove them" to stay, for which I will love him forever.) Go get loads of work, Shannone, we'll miss you!

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